I’ve gone back to fiction books now. I’m reading A change of Heart by Jodi Picoult. You may remember her name through the floods of tears that consumed you if you read My Sister’s Keeper.
This book is about a lot of things, but mostly it’s about love. Overwhelming, unconditional love that makes us do things our brain cannot comprehend and our/or our society’s ethics and morals find inexplicable. It’s really good – read it.
So, this month’s hope write-up finds hope in love. Cliche? Maybe. But February is to many a month of love. It’s also the month that I celebrate my mum’s and my pappous birthday so it’s overflowing with love.
I searched the word ‘love ‘ on the blog so that I could refer to any previous posts I made about the topic. Apparently, I use it in nearly every post. My favourites are: 100 posts
When living with Autism, love is something that you never think your kid will miss; because you love them so unconditionally. But then you’re driving and he sees a girl walking down the street and he waves at her; it’s so unexpected, it’s so out of character. Mum and I laughed so loud when Chris did that one time. However, it reminds you that love – that feeling that we all need, seek, treasure – is in all of us. Whether we can express it or not, we want love in our lives. Everyone who has Autism in their life has thought about how their kid might never have that feeling, might never find someone to love, live with and have a family with. It hurts. It’s a feeling that you wouldn’t wish on anyone.
I was on the bus yesterday when a couple sat in front of me and another sat behind me – I was trapped. Almost immediately the couple behind me (Couple 1) started tickling each other and the girl sat in front of me was stroking her boyfriends hair (Couple 2). Let me make the point that I am not a fan of PDA, I am not a fan of eavesdropping, lets just say – I am not a fan of couples. But, one of these two couples moved me so much – they were inspiration.
Anyway, to the point. I read the love story of Ron and Kristen Sandison the weekend. He jokes “My wedding anniversary is December 7th, and due to autism, I came into my new family like a kamikaze—a blazing whirlwind of fire.”
On their 3rd date Ron recalls that he revealed his “quirks” to Kristen: “After work every night, I spend 2 to 3-hours in Bible memory time. This daily routine empowers me to be able to quote over 10,000 Scriptures including 22 complete books of the New Testament, and over 5,000 quotes.”
At the 3 month point, he shared with her a story about how he carried around a stuffed prairie dog named Prairie Pup from kindergarten to sixth grade and that he collected and continues to collect Calico Critters; 3” tall animal figurines dressed with handmade outfits; hundreds of unopened boxes lined up in perfect rows against his bedroom wall at his parents’ house.
On their one year anniversary of their first date Kristen gave him the Calico Critters Meerkat Family.
On their 3 year anniversary, they had on Calico Critters on their wedding cake; the bride and groom were cats and the priest a beaver.
In March 2016, they welcomed a baby girl.
Ron thanks his wife for demonstrating compassion and sensitivity to his sensory issues by not using nail polish in their apartment or playing music with bass. He thanks her for proving everyone who doubted that Ron could be loved wholly and unconditionally by someone one day, wrong.
Ron writes for magazines and does guest lectures on autism. He wrote A Parent’s Guide to Autism: Practical Advice, Biblical Wisdom. Ron Sandison works full time in the medical field and is a professor of theology at Destiny School of Ministry. He is an advisory board member of Autism Society Faith Initiative of Autism Society of American. Sandison has a Master of Divinity from Oral Roberts University and Charisma House. Find out more about him here.
There is love out there for all of us. Refusing love because someone can’t stand the smell of bleach, because they are this, that or the other is judgement embedded in us by made up standards society imposes on us. It’s up to us to stand up to these moral, ethical, political barriers and believe that love trumps hate. For eons gone and for eons to come, one thing has been constant and one thing have we not been or will not be able to live without – love.
Happy Love month love bugs from me and my eternal Valentines: