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21 and Atypical: Christos

There are 180 posts about Christos on this blog so I will spare you the repeat and link you to the one that describes how I see him best. I wrote this on his 18th birthday and contributed it to Ambitious about Autism’s International Day of Families campaign.

Click to read: To Christos, on your 18th birthday: https://christos90.wordpress.com/2016/05/05/to-christos-on-your-18th-birthday/ 

Christos Profile: 

Born: 06.05.1998

Diagnosed: 2001

Loves: Music and Food

Loathes: People singing and ruining the music, sharing food.

Character: Cheeky monkey

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My mum does not recall the exact age but she remembers him being very “difficult” on his first birthday. We were recently watching old videos of all the cousins and in one video he is running after the camera, responding to his name and in the next he doesn’t turn around even after 4 -5 times of hearing his name.

Over the next few months/years my parents watched their big eyed, pointy eared little monkey become isolated. They took him in for hearing tests and were told there was nothing wrong. He started walking on his toes and at 2 years old he still hadn’t spoken any words. My parents saw a speech therapist who referred them to the general hospital in Nicosia for further exams on nothing specific. At the age of 3+ he was diagnosed from mild to moderate autism. At the age of 4+ he was diagnosed again in the UK.

The family were distraught. Would he go to school? Would he speak? Would he be able to take care of himself? Would he have friends? Fast forward 16 years and we have a young, gentle man full of promise, love, compassion, who has friends, who takes care of us and has a lot to say. He takes care of the people he loves and makes sure his friend Stephanos always has the swing next to him at break time.

My baby brother is iconic.

#21andatypical

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21 and atypical: Friendship

Countless interactions, conversations, memes and quotes indicate that friendship is voluntary mutual respect, support, loyalty, laughs and a connection that lasts a lifetime. Your classic examples of a friendship are images of people hanging out, going out, sharing experiences and emotions.

Would you consider it a friendship if the two people involved had never uttered a word to each other? If they had met when they were 7 and gone through primary school, high school, speech therapy, occupational therapy, music therapy, hyperbaric oxygen chamber therapy together without having a play-date or sharing a secret? Is it a voluntary friendship between the two boys if the parents were the ones that fit the friendship description above? If it was the parents who supported each other emotionally, mentally, called, shared their deepest darkest fears and found strength in their shared experiences?

Dr. Suzanne Degges-White , a friendship expert, explains that “True friendships are hallmarked by each member’s desire to engage with the other – it’s about mutual interest in one another’s experiences and thoughts, as well as a sense of ‘belongingness’ and connection…Friendships require reciprocity – of admiration, respect, trust, and emotional and instrumental support.

Christos and Stephanos met in 2005 when they started primary School in Ayia Napa. They were 7 years old and had been diagnosed with ASD – Autism Spectrum Disorder. Since then, they have grown up in each other’s presence.

52158514_408230119981576_493427098757627904_nThis year, they are turning 21 in May and June. This year, they leave school together. This year they find themselves facing a new challenge because governments don’t offer suitable support for adults with autism. This year, once again, they carve out a new path – their own path – which will be one that will enable other adults with autism to follow. Our boys will lead the way – again. They will inspire – again.

Over the next few months we (the two families), in collaboration with the Famagusta Autism Support Group, will be campaigning to raise awareness about autism in adults by attempting to give you a glimpse into Christos’ and Stephanos’ silent friendship. A friendship that is purely mutual respect and acceptance. A friendship that is as unique as the two gentlemen behind it.

The mission of the 21 and Atypical awareness campaign is to document how one pair of children with autism grew up to become adults with autism. We want to shed light on the highs and lows of their journey to adulthood through stories, memories, dreams and ambitions with an aim to create a world in which they are simply ‘adults’ accepted and accommodated by our societies. We hope that their story will inspire you to help us or your local autism group/organisation/neighbouring family build foundations for adults with autism to grow, set down roots and pave the way to a more positive future.